The mode of parenting in Nigeria is quite tough when compared to other countries especially Westernized countries. Unlike Nigeria, flogging kids is prohibited in other countries and is punishable by the law. This provision has made parents devise lesser means of punishing their kids. However, in Nigeria, it is not uncommon for parents to flog their kids.
Even though a good number of people may argue that flogging helps to correct children, it contributes in putting fear for their parents into their minds. Many Nigerian children are scared of having certain conversations with their parents because they are scared of being flogged. Also, kids who are constantly flogged are often scared of attempting certain things due to the fear of being flogged. This has stemmed from the fact that they do not want to make mistakes due to the fear of being punished.
Apart from flogging, African parents are known for being verbally abusive towards their kids instead of correcting them kindly. For example, if a kid spills water on the floor, instead of an African parent to tell the kid to go get a mopping stick, they resort to cussing them out first before any action is taken. One thing that parents fail to understand is that such verbal insults stick with a child for a very long time.
Another deficiency in Africa parenting is allowing third parties to mitigate issues in their home. In a lot of instances, when a child does something wrong, parents tend to bring in extended relatives or family friends to 'solve' the issue. This singular act may make such a child lose trust in their parents. It might make them wonder if some of their secrets are been kept safe with their parents, since such meager issues are being brought to the attention of the public.
African parents are also fond of restricting the movement of their kids and in worst case scenarios, they want to follow them everywhere they go, or they may even restrict them from keeping friends. Every child needs to grow up at some point and in most cases, kids leave their parent's houses to start their own life. Restricting them from movement and making friends takes a toll on their social life and sometimes their mental health. Such parents may end up raising kids that are socially awkward and cannot stand on their own even as adults.
In a lot of African homes, children are scared of their fathers and wary of their mothers. For example, if an African dad arrived home from work, immediately after greeting him, the children leave the sitting room where their dad is sitting. Most may see this as a sign of respect but it is important to spend time with your kids. Without spending time with your kids, your relationship will not be solid and you may end up raising strangers in your home. Also, African mothers are known for having a quick tongue and easily lashing out at their kids. They're also quick to flog their kids more than their fathers. This makes a lot of kids tolerate their mothers instead of loving them like they should.
All the above reasons has caused a lot of damage to African kids. You see kids growing up with social anxiety because their parents did not allow them to mingle earlier in life. Also, many adult Africans now have an issue with displaying their emotions because they are used to bottling them up in front of their parents.
One thing that some African parents fail to understand is that there are several methods of correcting your kids without flogging them or insulting them. For example, you can have conversations with your kids and make them see reasons why certain things aren't appropriate for their age and how it can affect them negatively in the future. Conversations stick with kids better than most African parents can imagine. Introducing this method will ensure a better generation of Africans.
